...After she's gone (the end of a story)

Never did I imagine our goodbye would be this cold... Still after she's gone forever, I can't help crying, and asking myself lots of questions that remained unanswered, silent, hidden within her deepest secrets...
Now I ask her, how does it feel to play with someone? To suddenly realise you have the power to make him feel as bad as you want to? How can you handle so much power? Being able to make him happy one day, and to make him kill himself the next day. What does it feel like, I ask? Will she ever have the guts to answer me?
Leaving metaphores and poetry out of this, making concrete questions, I ask: Why can other people make her do as they want to? Was I such a lousy lover? What did you want me to do in order to make my story believable? All I wanted was to have you back, nothing more... And yet you come and say "I don't know what's gonna happen..." As sad as I can get, I'm no poor asshole to be begging for a little of your love.
In other situations, I would've thought in killing myself. And that's no joke, I would have thought about it. But, you know? Fuck it. My conscience is clean, 'cause I did nothig to make this happen. It was the fucking people that made you do as they wished. Anyway, if you preferred the other people to the only one who would give his life in exchange for your love, then have it your way. I'm sure someday you will regret it. Or at least I hope so...

And the day you wish to make things better, as they were before... Well, I might be long gone for you, darling.

I love you. I still do. And I can say I love you a fuckin' bunch. But I'm no begger. There has to be someone out there who will indeed trust me no matter what, and then she will be able to make me forget about you. Because I warn you, and myself, that forgetting you will not be an easy task. It will take months, I'm sure of that. Months of remembering about you, of crying at night, of trying to look fine in front of my friends.

But hey, that's the price I pay, isn't it? That's what I get for loving you so fucking much...

"For the times together, for the times each was on its own, I promise, my dear, I will drown this sadness in venom, and leave them wither away with time. In the meantime, promise me to remember about me, and say 'I don't love you anymore...'"