... //

Oh, how I long to be okay again... I hate myself in these sudden, sad moments. I don't want anything back! I'm perfectly fine as I am right now! Why is this happening to me?

I don't want anything, or anyone, back. I DON'T. I've moved on. I'm happy as I am, and these fucking moments keep coming back. I can't keep the good memories, I always have to stick to the worst ones. Why?

I want this to end already... I need that turning point I've been waiting to happen, and I need it NOW.

I'm sick of myself.

Interlude: Memories // P6

It's like a blade throbbing in my brain;
I see myself, as clearly as if I were seeing myself in the mirror,
and I know it is me, from older times...

Slowly they fade away, causing less pain every time...
And I know I can't keep living like this, so I struggle.
I fight, and I dream I win...

I know things still aren't all right, I know I am not okay,
'cuz I still have one more verse to write.
The verse that will complete yet another book,
and will show me, once again, how strong I have become...

Saved Me (Too Strong To Destroy) //

We were both sent into a life of sorrow
Joys and tears that we were meant to borrow
This is not what I expected for a lifetime

One day, we came across each other
Both hurt, we couldn't go much further
It wasn't what I expected for salvation

And you came and saved me...

So let them try, let them cry
Let them tear themselves apart
Let them try, let them cry
They'll be gone before they start
They will not defeat this, no
It's too strong to destroy

I found the pieces of my heart
Held still, tightly in your hand
You were my way out

You taught me to trust
You knew I could love
You were salvation...

And you came and saved me...

So let them try, let them cry
Let them tear themselves apart
Let them try, let them cry
They'll be gone before they start
They will not defeat this, no
It's too strong to destroy

I am saved, I feel alive
I'm not leaving this life
I am saved, I feel alive
I'm not leaving...

Because you came and saved me...

Know //

I don't know who sent you here. I don't know how. I don't know why.

I don't know what I did to deserve this. It must've been something good. Something really, really good, 'cuz I know this is more than what I deserve.

How did I get her beautiful face to be mine? How come her shining eyes ever crossed me, and stayed here? How?

But I know I don't wanna know. All I want to do is hold on to this moment, hold on to you, and never let you go.

'Cuz, baby, all I know is how much I love you, and how I don't want it to go away... ever.

Quisiera Saber... //

Quisiera saber cómo hiciste para entrar en mi cabeza tan rápido... Y no quiero remediarlo. Quiero que te quedes ahí, que me sigas dando esta tranquilidad y esta serena felicidad que no puedo evitar sentir. Quisiera saber cómo hiciste para sacarme del oscuro agujero en el que estaba atrapado, del que no pensé que saldría, donde me ahogaba en lágrimas y recuerdos, y que con tu simple sonrisa me hiciste olvidar...

Quisiera saber por qué se me hizo tan sencillo abrirte las puertas después de todo lo que he vivido, después de sentirme tan traicionado como nunca, tan tonto y manipulado, tan ciego y tan iluso, tan olvidado y destrozado...

Quisiera saber por qué a pesar de que ha pasado tan poco tiempo, ya no puedo esperar a sentir tus abrazos, a mirarte a los ojos, a sentirme tan completo y tan lleno como cuando te tengo junto a mí...

Quisiera saber cómo funciona esto, por qué mi cabeza está tan llena de detalles que me recuerdan a tí a cada instante, por qué vuelan notas musicales a mi alrededor y las escucho tan claramente como si las estuvieras cantando tú, llenas de armonía y de una melodía tan hermosa y tan perfecta, que no puedo dejar de escucharlas dentro de mi cabeza...

Quisiera saber por qué es tan fácil mezclar mil canciones dentro de mi cabeza y por qué hago que cada una luche por recordarme una pequeña parte de tí, hazta formar tu imagen completa, tan radiante, tan feliz, tan tierna, tan hermosa como siempre...

Quisiera saber, y al mismo tiempo no me importa, por qué fuiste tú. Por qué, entre todas las personas que hay, entre tanta gente que me ha hecho daño y que no ha sabido verme por quien soy, te cruzaste tú en mi camino y lo iluminaste de la forma en la que lo estás haciendo... Qué fue lo que hice para merecerte, si es que te merezco, y por qué se atravezó una persona tan maravillosa como tú para hacerme cambiar el rumbo, para abrirme los ojos, para inyectarme ganas de seguir viviendo, de seguir sonriendo, de levantarme cada día y de no poder descansar hasta sentirte acurrucada conmigo...

Y en esta noche de insomnio, aunque no sé donde estés, y no sé si estés pensando en mí como yo en tí, sólo quiero decirte que te quiero... Quiero que estas palabras las lleve el viento hasta donde puedan encontrarte, que te transmitan el mensaje que quiero plasmar aquí, y que sientas lo que yo siento.

Quisiera saber por qué, después de haber escrito y pensado tanto, sigo sin encontrar las palabras exactas para describir lo que soy ahora, lo que soy en este momento, y por qué estoy escribiendo esto...

Me cuesta creer que me esté sucediendo esto. Es demasiado para mí. Es más de lo que merezco. Es una sensación que me inunda y me desborda, que me hace soñar despierto y pensar en tí a cada segundo, y el tiempo ha sido corto...

Quisiera saber qué será de mí en una semana, en un mes o en dos... No sé cuánto tiempo estarás conmigo, ni cuanto tiempo me seguirás haciendo sentir de esta forma tan increíble, tan indescriptible, tan irreal... Y quiero vivirlo al máximo a cada segundo.

Y en esta noche de insomnio, en la que extraño tus abrazos y tus ojos, en la que sueño despierto con un beso tuyo, y en la que anhelo poder tomar tu mano, sólo quiero darte las gracias por algo que tal vez no te das cuenta que has hecho: me has vuelto a la vida, y me has hecho creer, una vez más, en que tal vez hay alguien ahí afuera para mí. Me gusta creer que eres tú. Me encanta sentir que eres tú.

Te quiero!

Quiero //

No tengo prisa. No quiero cosas que sucedan en un instante. Quiero disfrutar cada segundo, quiero conocerte, saber tu color favorito, qué flores prefieres, la música que te gusta... Quiero saber qué te ha hecho feliz, y qué te ha hecho llorar... Quiero saber cómo hacerte sonreir, y no dejar que la sonrisa se desvanezca nunca. Quiero darme el tiempo de entrar en tus ojos y perderme en tu mirada, y merodear por allí y no regresar nunca...

Quiero darme una oportunidad más.... :)

Cigarette Kiss // P6

Last night I went out with her
We had lots of fun, I can't even tell
We watched a movie and had a coffee
We had a smoke, she was looking lovely

She couldn't be home much too late
I took the car and drove her there
She didn't want to leave, 'cuz it's me she'd miss
Out of nowhere, she gave me a kiss

So today,
I can remember just the taste
Not her eyes and not her face
Just the taste...

I picked her up on the next day
A lot of clouds, the day was looking gray
She was beautiful as ever, cigarette in hand
Yeah it was everything I could have in mind

We hung out in the car for a while
We parked under the dark gray sky
We had a smoke and we had a good talk
She kissed me and we went for a walk

So today,
I can remember just the taste
Not her eyes and not her face
Just the taste...

Her eyes have made me go crazy
Her beauty's what I've been facing
I enjoy every minute by her side
We're out of smokes and that just isn't right

And when she has to go home
It's everything I'll miss
Our cigarette kiss

So today,
I can remember just the taste
Not her eyes and not her face
Just the taste
Of our cigarette kiss

-------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------

Lista!! La nueva para Project Six salida de una estupidisma platica entre Sol y yo acerca de mi futuroo!:D jajaja además de que costó un poco de trabajo encontrar la rima para la primera estrofa (destacando la aportacion de Mauricio: We watched a movie and had a coffee / We had a smoke and had another coffee ¬¬, rima pero... estee...) pero al final quedo bieen... Ya empiezo a trabajar en la musica! :D

Crazy (She Doesn't Even Know It) //

I see her face
I never wanna look away again
Lost inside her eyes...
I cannot say
How I came to this again
After all the lies...

And all I have of her
Is her photograph
I only know her name
Yet she drives me....

Crazy, and she doesn't even know it
She saved me from the hole I was stuck in
She drives me
Crazy, and I wanna go and tell her
She's my heroine, my spark of shining light

Out of thin air
She appeared and changed my life
She doesn't even know it
It's just fair
I needed this change in my life
Yeah, she doesn't even know it

And all I have of her
Is her photograph
I only know her name
Yet she drives me....

Crazy, and she doesn't even know it
She saved me from the hole I was stuck in
She drives me
Crazy, and I wanna go and tell her
She's my heroine, my spark of shining light

---------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------------

Hoy Vuelvo A Ser Yo //

El día de hoy tuve una plática muy, muy intensa con varias personas que me quieren bastante. Hoy, no vengo a escribir poemas, hoy no vengo a romperme el corazón con mis propias palabras. Hoy soy yo, hoy escribe Charly, y hoy soy directo, hoy no escondo nada detrás de poemas, canciones, o metáforas. Hoy, vuelvo a decir, soy directo.

Yo no sé, no entiendo, y probablemente nunca entienda, cómo pudiste dejar de lado, dejar atrás, un año y nueve meses de historia. Y no de cualquier historia, sino de NUESTRA historia. Aún así, la decisión es tuya. Si era tan poco importante, si fue tan poco relevante, entonces entiendo perfectamente. A mí en lo particular no me va a ser tan fácil. Pero todo esto me ha recordado que soy tan FUERTE como el amor que te tengo y que no supiste valorar.

Va a ser bastante difícil, pero ahora he abierto los ojos. Siempre me consideré alguien que puede luchar, y tu lo viste varias veces, yo lucho y doy todo lo que tengo. Y sigo luchando, pero ahora ya no es por tí, sino por mí. Sigo dándolo todo, pero ya no es a tí, sino a todas las personas que me han apoyado, y que ven el valor que tengo, las ganas que le estoy poniendo, y que quieren ayudarme a caminar bien de nuevo. Y a todos ellos, MUCHAS, MUCHAS GRACIAS.

Y en cuanto a tí... Bueno, creo que he dicho más cosas de las que debí decir en los últimos días, así que no hay nada que no sepas. Te vuelvo a dar las gracias por todo, por la mejor época de mi vida, y por todo lo que me enseñaste en ese tiempo. Pero más gracias aún por lo que me estás enseñando ahora. Me hiciste mucho daño con ese cambio tan repentino, yo sé que tuve errores, pero se te hizo tan sencillo simplemente reemplazarme con otra persona... Y todo esto me ha enseñado muchas cosas, y me enseñará muchas más.

Te deseo toda la suerte del mundo, porque nunca he querido nada malo para tí, nunca, a pesar de la situación. Sí, sabes que te amo, pero ahora sé que ese amor no merece ser expresado. Es un amor puro y limpio, que al final te aburrió y no supiste valorar. Ojalá que él pueda darte algo que no te aburra con el tiempo, porque si le sucede lo mismo que a mí, pobre tipo.

Gracias, y mucha, mucha suerte!

En Lo Que Me He Convertido... //

Hacía ya varias noches que aquella estrella no le susurraba nada. No importaba que él saliera y la saludara cada noche, que la mirara con el mismo amor con el que siempre la miró, la estrella se mantuvo en silencio. No dejó salir ni el más mínimo suspiro, ni una gota de esperanza, ni un rastro de amor...
Todos sus pequeños rituales, sus evocaciones, sus recuerdos, las fotos, las canciones, frases, e incluso toda la fé que le podía dar el amor que sentía, se desplomaban a sus pies. Ardían hasta quedar sólo cenizas cada noche, y como el ave fénix, con la estúpida idea de que la esperanza es lo último que muere, renacían a cada amanecer. A diario, él se preguntaba dónde estaría ella, y en qué estaría pensando... Sabía que no era en él, pero aún así, la curiosidad lo asediaba a cada segundo... ¿Se acordaría, al menos por dos segundos, de él en algún momento? ¿Acaso no había nada en este mundo que hiciera que ella lo recordara como el fiel amante que siempre fue?
Y ahora, todos sus planes estaban deshechos. No podía ni siquiera dirigirle la mirada, porque ella la evitaba. No podía dirigirle una palabra de amor, porque ella no la oía. No podía ya tocar su piel ni perderse en sus ojos, porque todo estaba demasiado lejos de él. Tan inalcanzable como imposible.

Ahora él debe vivir con sus recuerdos, tragarse esa serenata interminable que pensaba regalarle, plasmar sus palabras, que ahora parecían sin sentido, en un simple pedazo de papel que ella ya nunca leería... Compartir su vida y su habitación con la soledad que ella le regaló, y que es ahora lo único que él tiene. Extrañándola como a nada, amándola en silencio y en secreto, espiándola cada mañana, robando un poco de cada sonrisa suya para construir poco a poco un buen recuerdo de ella. Ahora en eso se había convertido: en un ladronzuelo de sentimientos, de miradas, de sonrisas, que ni siquiera le pertenecían a él. Ahora pertenecen a alguien más, y el no podía soportarlo. Tenía que robar aunque fuera lo más mínimo de cada suspiro que ella dejara salir, tenía que capturar un poco de las risas que ella expulsaba. Tenía que mantener en su cabeza el aroma que dejaba caer cada que pasaba a su lado, sin siquiera mirarlo. Era un pequeño ladrón...

----------------------------------
----------------------------------

Si estás ahí, escúchame. No es necesario que me respondas. Solamente escúchame, y escucha que te amo. Escucha que mi corazón late cada vez más lento, que mi respiración es cada vez más pausada. Escucha mi voz cada vez más frágil, escucha el sonido de mis lágrimas contra el suelo cada noche, y la estrella que alguna vez me regalaste es testigo. Escucha mis lágrimas consumirse en la tela de mi almohada... Sólo escúchame, no es necesario que respondas... Escucha en el silencio mis gritos desgarradores; mis sueños, que son sólo eso: sueños. Escucha mis pesadillas... Escúchame, no es necesario que respondas...

Te extraño tanto.....

Can't Say Goodbye // P6

I remember when I could hold your hand
I remember I could have you by my side
I can't understand what happened to me
I never ever though it'd be just like this

And I couldn't make you see
You wouldn't hold on to me
Oh, no...

I may be hurting, I may be leaving
But I cannot say goodbye
I may not want to, I can't just have you
So I cannot say goodbye

I can't sleep at night for the things I've done
Things I've said, things gone wrong
I just want to make it up again, make it okay
Be the same you loved every single day

But I just can't make you see
And you don't want to hold on to me...
No, no...

I may be hurting, I may be leaving
But I cannot say goodbye
I may not want to, I can't just have you
So I cannot say goodbye

I cannot say goodbye just yet...

I may be hurting, I may be leaving
But I cannot say goodbye
I may not want to, I can't just have you
So I cannot say goodbye

I know this is not done just yet
Our story is far from over
But I'm leaving, I'm getting away from you
But I just cannot say goodbye...

-------------------------------------
-------------------------------------

S.O.S

Pensé que sabía lo que era el sufrimiento. Pensé que sabía lo que era la angustia, la impaciencia, el miedo... Pensaba que era tolerante, pensaba que los impulsos estaban lejos de mí... Pensaba conocer la incertidumbre, pensaba que conocía la oscuridad de pies a cabeza, pensaba que sabía lo que era vivir a medias...
Pero todo lo que conocía se reduce a conocer lo básico, lo simple, lo minimalista... Nunca antes había experimentado esta sensación, esta necesidad por estar en constante movimiento, por engañar a mi mente manteniéndola ocupada en las tareas mas idiotas, como caminar en círculos en mi habitación. Nunca antes había sentido la necesidad de no estar solo, de no escuchar música, de no leer, de no saber de nada más que de mi habitación dando vueltas alrededor de mí. Porque todo, cualquier detalle, incluso el olor familiar de mi habitación el cual es lo único que debo soportar, me recuerda a tí. El ver a través de la ventana, el oír la lluvia, música, leer anuncios o revistas, en todas partes estás tú. Y tú, en este momento, no quieres estar conmigo...

Alguien inyécteme algo de vida... Alguien convénzame de que el tiempo puede pasar más rápido de como lo estoy percibiendo, como si cada segundo fuera una hora... Alguien deme algún color, quítenme lo gris, lo inerte, pónganme una sonrisa en el rostro, aunque sea por minutos...

Te necesito aquí, y ya no sé a quien mandarle mensajes de ayuda... Ya no sé...

My Mistake

I know that I've made mistakes
I don't deny it
I've fallen into disgrace
I can't take it

I know that I hurt you,
I know that you loved me
I can only think of you

And I see my mistake
And I wanna make it up
And I can't fight for you
When you don't let me around you

And I see my mistake
And I can't make you see I've learned
I don't want to be like this
I swear I've seen my mistake...

I can't be the same again
The happy person
I die just hear my name
In your lips

I know that I hurt you
Please know that I loved you
I can only think of you

And I see my mistake
And I wanna make it up
And I can't fight for you
When you don't let me around you

And I see my mistake
And I can't make you see I've learned
I don't want to be like this
I swear I've seen my mistake...

I just want to see myself
Reflected in your eyes again
I want hold you, kiss you, take you by the hand

And I see my mistake
And I wanna make it up
And I can't fight for you
When you don't let me around you

And I see my mistake
And I can't make you see I've learned
I don't want to be like this
I swear I've seen my mistake
And I wanna make it up
And I can't fight for you
When you don't let me around you

And I see my mistake
And I can't make you see I've learned
I don't want to be like this
I swear I've seen my mistake...

...como el masoquista que siempre he sido //

Hoy, me sentí arropado por la eterna oscuridad de la noche. Tomándome una copa con la soledad, mi antes desaparecida amiga, quien me visita cada vez más frecuentemente, me preguntaba dónde estoy parado, o qué estoy haciendo... ¿Por qué disfruto tanto el mirar mi agonizante reflejo en el espejo, sufriendo y cayendo en pedazos, como el masoquista que siempre he sido? ¿Por qué el sofocante eco del silencio grita y repite nombres que no tienen ningún sentido para mí?

Hoy sé que la indecisión y la duda son mis más grandes enemigas. Hoy sé que la sospecha, espía de la descofianza, no es buena aliada ni buena compañera. Y sin embargo, disfruto tanto de su presencia... Sé que mis pensamientos están atrapados dentro de la bruma del pesimismo; mi cuerpo y alma con las cicatrices visibles de los ataques salvajes de la tristeza y la depresión, que atacan y dañan al cuerpo, pero con sus fauces destrozan al corazón...

Hoy me doy cuenta que vivo en mi propia sombra, que me escondo del sol y de la luz, que no encuentro el sentido del camino, que el viento me susurra pero no quiero escucharlo por miedo a saber mi propia verdad. Hoy me doy cuenta que sufro y lloro, que vivo y muero, que respiro veneno a cada momento sólo porque así lo he decidido, sólo porque así me gusta vivir, por el terror a salir a enfrentarme conmigo mismo en una batalla que podría destruir mi mundo, destruirme a mí, pero al mismo tiempo, ganarme y convertirme en mi propio vencedor, en mi amo, en mi domador. Hoy sé que soy solo un pequeño por ciento de lo que puedo ser porque me lo repito a cada momento, como el masoquista que siempre he sido...

...to fall so deep... //

Enslaved my heart, and her apathy's been revealed. You're bounded by a fear for loneliness. You showed me fidelity, then filled me with a false sense of hope. This will be my last goodbye before I leave you to your regrets...

Now seal this elegy with another somber kiss, and it shall be just a corteous reminder of what we once were. I'll leave your lips soaked in remenants of a love held together by deception; and so, death is masked as my savior...

Martyred in your heartless name, but the detriment was much too profound for you to mend my wounds sweetly with your darkened kiss.

You've bled my heart dry.

You could mean the world to me, and nothing less, throughout eternity. You're the end of the world to me. You're a beautiful contradiction possessing me. But with weary steps, I shall press on no longer...

Now watch as the blade cuts through my skin, and this blood will rain forever over your guiltless head, like a storm cloud sent by the heartbroken, those who slept and faded away in the same path I now walk.

Could you hold this close to your heart forever? Will you hold this close to your heart forever and always? Or will my blood rain over your guiltless head forever and always?

Tonight / Here's To Everything That's Going On //

You win so much, only to lose so much
There's never enough in this damn life
And so you climb so high, just to fall so deep.

It takes a moment to realize
You're going down in flames
You're not living what you thought you were

Tonight, you know you're a ghost
Tonight, you see how false your happiness was
Tonight, you break down and swim in rivers of tears
Tonight, you're yourself once again....

----------------------------------
----------------------------------

I can't write another poem. I can't write another song. I can't think of any fictional, heartbroken story. You're taking the last of me. This is me, this is how I'm feeling now. And I'm going crazy. I'm going paranoid, I'm seeing things. I'm dying slowly.
You're acting strangely. Not the one I knew, again. You'd think that's the thing that's killing me. But you're wrong. The only things that can kill me are your lies. Do whatever you want to, but don't fucking lie to me. I guess that's what's going on.
Anyway... I'm dry. You've dried me up. So I'm going away, I'm sleeping for months and I'm not coming back. Hah, I wish.

I wish....

Another note... //

She entered her room, after a long exhausting day. She only wanted to lay on her bed and sleep, but there was something that was holding her back: him. He was back, or it seemed like it, and he was just the way she remembered: handsome, gallant, lovely... and hurting. Yes, what he had done may had seemed mean and wrong, but she couldn't blame him. She couldn't blame him for anything he did. He was HIM, after all.

She walked inside and just like if it were magic, she found a note on her bedside table. She recognized the calligraphy immediately. It was from him...

"I'm sorry. I don't want to be the same I was before, I don't want to do the
same thing I did before... But it seems impossible to stay away from you and not
touch you, hold you, feel you... I'm trapped inside my own life, and I'm
addicted to you outside it. I'm confused, I hesitate and I don't regret loving
you... I don't regret showing -discreetely-, my love for you. I know who I am,
but I don't know what I want... And still, I'm addicted to you. I'm sorry,
please forgive me and do not fall in love with me. You've tried once, and it
didn't come out well. I wouldn't forgive myself if it happened a second time...

Know that I love you... You know who wrote this, and you know why I'm
saying sorry... So please, keep this in your heart..."

He was right. She knew who he was, and she knew why he had written the note in the first place. She felt happy, confused, and disappointed. He loved her! But he didn't know what he wanted... Then he had asked her not to fall in love with him. It was probably too late for that, perhaps?

--------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------

Another rainy day...

Hello.

This time, I'm not here to write another story or another song for the heartbroken. This time I'm here to write about me, about what I've been thinking... And I came up with this a few minutes ago.

What's with the weird weather? With the lately events? Sun and rain and cold and too much hot. Earthquakes. What's with all of it?

A close friend of mine (of whom I've known nothing lately...) is one of those people with rather different beliefs. He's not a Catholic, or a Christian, or any other religion. He says his only God is Mother Nature. We're here because of her, and nothing else, he says. He claims she's sent us giants that hide beneath the mountains, that speak through the wind and send us the punishment we deserve for hurting and insulting Mother Nature and her home: "our" planet. These giants cause our thunderstorms, our cold and our heat, our earthquakes... What's wrong with believing such things?

I just wanted to share this. It's a formidable way of thinking, and even better, to let people know what you believe. To fight for your ideas, to defend them. Because that's what makes us who we are, that's what makes us stronger: our own ideas.

Anyway, what's life without some rain? Without some cold to give us the need for a comfortable warmth? What's life without a hot, sunny day to tell us it would be nice to enjoy a day out with our friends?

What's the point of this? Well, it's pretty simple. This is the time we were meant to live. This is the planet we were meant to take care of, in its current state. And so we must do. Live your life, enjoy it, help others and worry about their disgraces. Be grateful for who you are, be proud of your success and of your failure, of everything you learn and forget. Love you for who you are and for what you think, and learn to tolerate what others think as well, as long as they don't go against our own nature.

Live. Love. Die...

----------------------------
----------------------------

Bueno, pues todo está dicho arriba. Esta vez no hablaban uno de mis personajes, o no era una canción triste y depresiva (que al parecer es lo único bueno que sé escribir :O). Nuestro mundo es hermoso, suban a un edificio y observen su ciudad. Observen las montañas que hay mas allá y como cae la lluvia sobre todo, como te sopla el viento en el rostro, y el sol deslumbra sus ojos. Sientan el calor, abríguense del frío y disfruten ver la lluvia caer sobre la ventana. Es lo mejor que se puede hacer cuando uno no sabe lo que está haciendo aquí...

His Note

He needed to write.

He needed to let go of everything. It was too much in too little time. She was far away, she was not a tiny bit close to him, and she probably never would. He had to let it go...

"I can't see anymore. I can't hear, or think of nothing else. She's not here. I
can't see her. And she will never see me. This is a secret love I will take to
the grave, for I can't even dream of holding her hand. I've dreamt of beautiful
landscapes, beautiful words and sounds coming from her lips, dreamt of her eyes
covering me in their warmth... I've dreamt of every possible beautiful detail in
her, but I can't see myself holding her hand. I can't see my arms around her. I
can't dream of ever kissing her."

He took a deep breath. He was finding hard to say what he wanted to say without saying it straight to the point. He was never a simple guy, he liked his own personal drama. Yet everything he was writing down in his beautiful calligraphy was completely true: he was tied to a secret, yet impossible, love story. A story he couldn't complete even in his wildest dreams.

"I feel like I've given up, but I really haven't. I am still here, in the
dark, waiting for her shining beacon. I don't care about what people say. I
don't care how far she is from me. How impossible it may seem. How sad my music
is. I just want her here, is that too much too ask? I can have other ones here,
everyone, except the one I want to. Because for some strange reason, I give a
step forward and she gives three. And she gets farther away every time..."

Now tears were starting to cuddle in his eyes. It wasn't the first time he stained his notes in tears... He needed her. And she didn't realize it, not because she didn't want to, but because he couldn't let her know. He was tied, he was silenced, and he was dying by the second. His time was running out, and she wasn't aware of that. He could look at her, and she could look at him, not realizing what was going on inside his eyes...

"I could make her happy. And she could make me the happiest. Though I would
like to be saying this in her face, and not just in plain paper..."

He addressed his last lines to her, as if she were reading them. As if those lonely words would ever make it to her shining eyes and make her realize how much he needed her, how much she meant to him...:

"I just want to say you're beautiful. Plain beautiful. You're my own
personal angel, and you don't even know it. Perhaps that's better, isn't it? You
don't have to force yourself to be here, because you already are. I already have
you in my mind, in my heart. If only I could touch you, watch you in your sleep,
keep you safe inside your dreams... I would kiss you goodnight and leave the
lamp on, I wouldn't let anyone or anything haunt you... I would be your guardian
angel. You'd never be alone... And if you're reading this, if you really are,
know who I am. Know me, and know I breathe because you breathe as
well.

And know, too, that my heart beats for you, and the day that your
heart beats for someone that's not me, and you are happy, then I shall be too,
in my own personal way. I wouldn't be able to see you in some other person's
arms, but I would feel glad to see you smiling. To see you smiling and never
shed a tear for someone... Because your smile will light up my eyes every
morning, and will let them sleep every night. Smile, breathe, and live, my love.
I will stand guard. I will wait, and I will fight. Know that I'm here... Know
that I secretly, and forbiddenly, love you..."

He fell asleep, his note held tight against his chest. His dreams, again, of her and her beauty, but never of holding hands. She would never love him. He didn't deserve her, and he knew it. That's what made it so impossible.

That's what made him so miserable...

Not A Single Word //

This is the last you'll ever hear of me
My last regret
The last tear you'll see me drop before my fatal escape
Before I'm gone

I never thought you wouldn't hold me back
You let me go
You don't care at all, and you never did
I'm going down

Not a single word about what this meant
No screams and no stars inside my night sky
Just one big disappointment and the promise to never go back
I can't set a foot here again!

All this time and you thought I wasn't alive
I was right beside you
You never dared to look to your side
No, I'm not another ghost
But I will be

Your coldness and your hating gaze have hurt me
Have sent me straight down to my tomb
Where I may find the deepest of my fears
The eternal memory of you

Not a single word about what this meant
No screams and no stars inside my night sky
Just one big disappointment and the promise to never go back
I can't set a foot here again!

Dear God, it's her again!
I scream and no one hears my voice
I run and there's nowhere to escape
I'm afraid of you

My nightmare inside a dark graveyard
The moon reflects the beautiful face that scares me every night
The wind whispers in your voice words I don't want to hear again
I hate you! I'm so afraid of you!

Not a single word about what this meant
No screams and no stars inside my night sky
Just one big disappointment and the promise to never go back
I can't set a foot here again!

---------------------------------
---------------------------------

Wow! Esta me gusto :D. Ninguna inspiración en especial, además de las buenísimas letras de Alesana (ya baje su nuevo disco!! :D:D). Aunque tal vez, si vemos un poco más allá de las palabras, o leemos entre líneas, podemos encontrar algo que tal vez nos ha sucedido a varios, en una forma un poco más oscura, dramática y (puramente) romántica. ¿Le tienes miedo a esa persona que tanto amas? ¿Es eso posible?

Soundtrack To a Lifetime //

He walked along, wherever the street took him. He had his iPod on and a guitar hanging on his back, and his hands were drumming along to some punk rock inside his head. Where was he going? No one knew for sure, except him, and he had locked the thought away into a secret chamber inside his labyrinth mind.

Every once and then he'd stop, take a notebook out of his guitar's gig bag and write down a song, or some chords he had come up with. Some suggested sad, dark songs; others went angry and against everything he was forced to bow down to. He'd write a drum line, and add vocals. He was a musician. He wrote about what he'd heard, what he'd seen, what he'd felt... Some words could be apparently empty, but he knew the meaning inside every symbol he wrote in his old notebook. Then he'd stand up, put the iPod and the hoodie on, and keep walking, taking a smoke once in a while.
And at the end of his day, he had written down yet another masterpiece. He would lay down somewhere warm and sleep off his weariness. The next morning, he'd wake up and walk again, seeing where his feet took him.

And at the end of his life, he had written the perfect soundtrack to a lifetime...

-------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------

Esta es la historia detrás de una canción instrumental que escribí, todo girando alrededor de lo que es una vida: altas y bajas, lágrimas y sonrisas. Hay tiempos brillantes y felices, y hay otros furiosos y oscuros. ¿Y cuántos de nosotros sabe hacia donde vamos? Y los que saben, ¿lo saben en realidad? ¿No somos como el personaje, siguiendo el camino, a ver a dónde nos lleva? ¿No somos nosotros esclavos de nuestros propios pies, sin poder darles orden alguna?

La canción no está terminada todavía, pero creo que va bien... Después de todo, ¿en cuánto tiempo se termina el soundtrack de una vida entera?

Impossible To Reach // [P6]

Yes, I know
We're from different realities
We are not who we're supposed to be
I am meaningless...

Yes, I know
I am tied to someone else
Oh, the pressure of society
Yes, I know I'm dying slowly

Why?
Cuz your eyes have got me trapped
And your face has been denied
I can't dream of holding hands...

Cuz you're forbidden for me
And it's all because of me
Your angel voice,
you're beautiful
And you're impossible to reach
You're impossible to reach...

Hello, once again,
I think it's all that I can say
Until the day you go away

I can't hold you
No, I can't have you
I'm not supposed to dream of you...

Cuz you're forbidden for me
And it's all because of me
Your angel voice,
you're beautiful
And you're impossible to reach
Impossible...!

I know it's just a silly dream
This is me imagining
Yes it's not what's real for me

Forbidden for me...
Impossible to reach...

Cuz you're forbidden for me
And it's all because of me
Your angel voice,
you're beautiful
And you're impossible to reach
You're impossible to reach...

-------------------------------------
-------------------------------------

Una canción que no tiene motivo alguno, nada más fue puraa inspiracion :). Esta va para componerle música para la banda, Project Six. Apoyennos para que podamos grabar nuestras canciones (y tener ganas de escribir más! :D)!! Vayan a myspace.com/projectsixrock y comentennos, haganse nuestros amigos y si no tienen Myspace, pues se van consiguiendo uno nada mas para apoyarnos =D.!